Lack of Ethernet.

Just so you all know, because I'm sure you're all terribly concerned and/or bored with our blog, but we have no internet at the moment and haven't had it since...I think a day after our last post. Hopefully this will be sorted in the next week and a half. If not...you'll never, EVER, hear from us EVER again!




Just kidding of course. Anyways, hope you're all doing well and buying us lots and lots of Christmas presents because you're all great people. If you need our mailing address to send money,food, electronics, paintings, priceless artifacts...etc. Just ask and we shall post it when we get the chance.


Morgan

I've got a strange disease

Well the past few days I've been feeling rather ill. Today is the worst day so far, I've been having strange hallucinations, my sinuses are killing me, my stomach feels upset, and even my teeth hurt! It's very strange and I'm hoping it doesn't progressively get worse. I have however been looking up doctors in the area just in case of emergency. I'm hoping that this illness passes soon, I don't much care to be sick without my momma to take care of me. But to make myself feel better, I've put on my giant footie pajamas, took my blankie and my pillow and am going to sleep on the couch tonight so I don't bug Jesse with my dying and night horror hallucinations where I wake up screaming ''AH MOMMAAAAAAAA!!!! NO STOP HITTING ME!!! MOMMA PLEASE NO!!!'' Just kidding of course haha. Anywho, I'm going to go lay down and drink me some tea!


Morgan

Our Halloween Costume of Doom.

So Jesse and I went out trick or treating last night. We probably had the worst costume ever but everyone seemed to love it for some strange reason. We only went to three houses though because there were no children out. Anyways here is our costume!

Fortress of Solitude.

So, Morgan's been gone for a almost a week. Being alone... isn't all that bad. It's kinda nice actually. A little lonely, but there's no need to compromise and I can do whatever I want! Shaving? Who needs it? Fancy meals? Not for me. Clothing? Yes. Yes, I do need clothing. Even when Morgan is gone, clothing is still a must, except for designated naked areas like the bathroom and kitchen.

How does one entertain themselves when their entertainment is 5 hours away in a theme park? Well. One reads books. And one cooks, and one searches the Internet for all manners of entertainment. Mostly that comes in the form of documentaries. Ask me anything you want to know about Charles Manson, I've seen three movies about him. Oh. I've also been looking for jobs. Endlessly. What great defeat job hunting imposes on the spirit. I've spent hours scouring the city for ''for hire'' signs. I've applied to about 6 different places. Butcher shops, card shops, pizza places, bakeries and diner's. It's so crushing to hand in your resume and sit at home and just know that the chances of anybody telephoning me are slim. I wish somebody had told me that, apparently school isn't important, unless you want to do more school. Go to school, get good grades, and maybe you can go to university or college. I wish I had known that school means nothing when trying to get a job. I think I may have been better off now, if I had gotten a job when I was 14 and stuck with working until I graduated. It's very frustrating knowing that school means nothing and employers don't care what your grades are like, or if you've never missed a day of school, etc etc... They want experience. For good reason of course. But... I don't have experience. One job means nothing. Or maybe it does and I'm just frustrated of certain others successes with this particular matter. Job hunting is simply frustrating. Oh well. I'll keep on that. Any advice on the matter? Comments section please.

The One That Got Away

On the subject of entertainment, fishing proves to be a splendid way to pass the time. To tell you the truth, I had always held the belief that fishing was boring, and stupid and only the father figures from the Sunday comics would put themselves through the drudgery of fishing. Anyone else who fished was just a plain boring person. But it's awesome. It's terribly enjoyable, and the whole killing the fish thing is a lot easier. I've managed to keep myself from screaming like a little girl when I cut it's head off. But! I've a story to tell. A story my friends, about the one that got away.
There I was...standing... and holding my fishing rod when I felt a small tug on the line. Then a big tug, then a huge tug that sent me in a stumbling mess toward the edge of the water and straight into the fence. The line was pulled taught and my pole looked like it was going to snap. I pulled and pulled and looked toward the water and that's when I saw it, flipping about in the water like an alligator in a death roll. It was huge. It was a beast. It had these terrible teeth sticking out of it's head and it looked like it could have swallowed a toddler. I panicked and tried to think quickly about what I should do next. It was far to large to reel in. Not only that, but I very much intended on keeping my limbs. I struggled to think as it flopped around in the water and thrashed around, creating it's own wake in the calm water. I decided it would be best for both my limbs, and the beast fish, if I cut the line. I let out some line and backed toward my tackle bag grunting like a fat asthmatic jogging behind an ice-cream truck. As I reached for my bag, the fish broke away and that was it. He was gone, and I was safe.
And that my friends, is my very first fisherman's tale, about the one that got away.

It's been an interesting week in Plymouth. Last night.... I got a call from (hopefully) one of Morgan's friends who was commenting about how sexy I looked in my facebook pictures. The number was blocked, but I just assumed it was Morgan's boyfriend playing some sort of strange trick on me. And I'm still hoping I'm right in assuming so.

One of the strange culture shocks in coming to Plymouth would have to be the constant fighting. Not many days pass that I don't see two or more men beating each other senseless or two women screaming their necks off. It's absolutely prevalent here. I can't say I feel as if I'm in any danger, because everyone has generally been very kind to me, but it is rather strange to walk past a couple getting into each others faces, or a drunkard stumbling toward me in the middle of the day.
Cougars

Clubbing in England is fantastic. Morgan and took a trip down to a local club the other week. A 70's themed club! Ya. It was awesome. Lot's of fun, lot's of dancing. But, as I should have expected, with 70's clubs (or maybe just bars and clubs in general) comes 70's women. You know. The.. the older ladies. The forty-plus-ers. Nothing wrong with them. They add character, and they're fun to dance with. Most of them anyway. This is the revolting tale of one such lady who was not much fun. Not much fun at all. While at the club, Morgan and I had decided to take a break from dancing and instead focus on getting something liquidy and impairing into our bodies. It was my turn to get drinks to off to the bar I went and that where I bumped into her...
We'll call her.... Betty.
The dialogue between Betty and I went a little something like this.
Betty-( to be read in a raspy, horrible British accent. )
''Ello there''
''Hi!''
''Are you gay?''
''Ummm, nope.. nope, sorry.''
She stumbles a bit and her drink spills on her hand. She takes no notice.
''Are you Ammmmmarican?''
''Nope, I'm from Canada.''
''But ya not gay then?''
''No. Still not gay''
''But ya breath smells like gaaalic (garlic) and gays breath smells like gaaaalic.''
''Ya, sorry, I've been eating garlic''
She comes in close to my face with a yellowing smile, winks at me and says
''It's ok, I like gaaaalic.''
''Well, that's lucky then...''
She gets really close to my face then slips past toward my ear, and brushing my ear with her lips she says
''..mmm, so, you're sure you're not gay then...''
''YUP!''
She slowly pulls her head away from mine and her lips gently brush against my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. My knees feel weak and I tell her I have to get some drinks back to my girlfriend. She gives me a quick look from top to bottom and nods her head with a wink, and I'm outta there.

Ya. England is fun. That's all for now. Peace out... P-town.

OH MY GOD WE KILLED SOMEONE!....well something.

Sooooooooooo last night, Jesse and I went night fishing because we're really cool. We had low expectations for catching fish as we had not caught any the night before, however we were more prepared this time. We had been fishing for about 30 mins before our first real nibble. I wasn't quite sure if it was just the tide pulling out our hook or if it was a fish, so I started to reel back in just to check. Sure enough our first fish ''Floppy'' was on the line. I pulled him up on to the dock and Jesse and I just started screaming like little girls. Jesse swiftly bashed Floppy in the head several times with our ''Fish Killer'' (an empty olive oil bottle wrapped in hockey tape) and the freaking fish would NOT die. Finally he stopped flopping around so we chucked him in our fish bag.

Jesse put some bait on the hook again and cast out, not even 5 minutes later we had another fish on the line! Jesse pulled him in and he was even bigger than Floppy (not much bigger, but still bigger). Jesse chucked him on the dock and I gave him one swift blow to the noggin and he was paralyzed. I thought I'd hit him one more time just to be sure he was dead, and he reanimated...it was quite strange....so I wacked him again and he bled from the eye so we called him Bleeding Eye Murphy and threw him in with Floppy.

Once we got back home we poured the fish into the sink to only find that....they were still alive! Floppy was flopping around like mad, and Bleeding Eye Murphy was just laying there breathing his last breaths. We were so scared, and had no idea what to do. So we called around and found that our only option was too chop off their heads. The only problem was that we had the dullest of knives and they were serated. So Jesse grabbed Bleeding Eye Murphy first because well, he was the most dead. He lowered the knife to his neck and it was almost like the fish knew what was going on, his eye slowly drifted upwards staring at us, I'm sure he was cursing us '' YOU FOOLS! Why couldn't you have given us a quick death instead of making us suffer!'' we apologized to them for not being experienced fishers and Jesse began chopping - sawing rather, Bleeding Eye Murphy's head off. It was horrible, his mouth opened wide and it was as if he was trying to scream out. So Jesse and I screamed instead like little girls and had a hug right after because it was so sad. (Now we know why people are vegetarians)

Next to the cutting board was Floppy. I forgot to mention this but while the fish were in the sink, we were looking up on the internet how to kill a fish and it said to stab them in the head behind the eye....so we did it to Floppy....and it didn't do anything, just made him flop around in much more pain. So anyways, once Floppy was on the cutting board we knew what to expect...so Jesse sawed off his head and we plopped both of the decapitated fish into a bag then into the fridge.

Only a few minutes later, I was speaking to my parents on Skype, and they told us that we had to gut the fish or else they would rot. ''Had we not done enough slaughtering for the night!'' we thought. So back to the fridge we went, and grabbed the headless fish and plopped them back on the cutting board. Jesse had read up on how to gut a fish so he sort of knew what to do. It seemed to be going alright apart from it being utterly disgusting. So after the butchering, we had 4 fish fillets, that we later discovered were cut wrong but whatever, it was our first time. So hopefully we'll be out fishing again and know what to do next time haha.


Morgan and Jesse

This video was done on my phone so shitty quality. But genuine reactions haha.

Gobbildy Gook.

Well it seems that Joseph fails at finishing posts, so I thought I may as well post some more until he actually decides to finish and publish a post. I found two posts on here that he has yet to put up and am quite disappointed as I know there quite a few people who actually read this account of our lives here. I actually find it quite interesting to think that people read our blog, it's as if we're creating our own little gossip magazine.

Right, so anyways. If you haven't figured this out already or if no one has told you, Jesse is now here. He got here last Friday, and to my surprise he got in to Plymouth much earlier than I had anticipated. I was expecting him to get in at 3pm, and I believe he got in at quarter to noon. I had gotten a call from his mother and had to make a mad dash to the train station, I don't think I've ever walked so fast in my life! Then of course we walked back from the train station to the flat, then back again to city centre to get groceries. So there was quite a lot of walking that day.

There was quite a lot of walking yesterday also, as we had many a things to do. We went to the bank to get Jesse set up with a bank account here, got our National Insurance Numbers sorted (SIN), I showed him around the Barbican and the Hoe and we bought some fishing gear. The total walking time was approx 6 hours. Let's just say I've got legs of steel my friends, pure iron legs.

I'm sure you're wondering why we bought fishing gear...Well the ocean is only a 3 minutes walk away from our flat and there's always people fishing so we figured, ''why not!'' So we fished, and failed to fish. We shall try again another time and hopefully catch something large and in charge.


Anyways, off to go apply for more jobs.


MORGAN!

A new delight.

Sorry I haven't posted lately (don't shout at me or anything, please you'll make me cry). But I've been out and about discovering the rural area with friends. Last week I stayed at 4 different guys houses (hahaha that sounds horrible, but they're just friends from school) they all live in a town called Saltash which is just outside Plymouth, and just by Plympton. It's a nice little area very ''small english village'' like. I did take pictures and was going to post them but my batteries are dead in my camera....so I can't post them. SORRY!

But whilst on my wild and wacky adventures out there, I discovered a new delight of which I will share with you....it is called a ''Crisp Sandwich''. Basically two pieces of bread, buttered, chips of your choice in between the bread. It sounds freaking weird but it's DELICIOUS! Also ''Chip Sandwiches'' are good too, you just replace the crisps with fries and ketchup. It's brilliant.

Anyways, sorry this is a short post but I'm going to go finish eating my sandwich hahaha.


Morgan!

THE PARK!

Alrighty, so I finally went to that park the other day haha. It's actually the most amazing park ever, and literally only 30 seconds away from my house (well actually 46 seconds but who's counting?). Anyways, as you walk up the road all you can see is this huge angel statue... Then as soon as you walk up to the statue you're on top of a huge hill overlooking the dockyards, it's actually insanely beautiful. I was like how the hell did I not know about this madness? So I think that's my new reading spot, there's loads of benches and trees to sit under on the hill.

The other day while I was grocery shopping I ''brought'' Sex And The City: The Movie, it's actually hillarious I loved it! I sat there and drank wine and ate these little chocolate rocky road crispy things...I felt like my mom hahahaha. Don't worry momma I love you, I just thought it was hilarious I like transformed in to you haha.

Today hasn't been too exciting terribly exciting, nothing much else to report I'm afraid. Hopefully this evening will be more exciting. I'm having some friends over, maybe I'll be really loud like the Polish people upstairs and tick them off because I know they always make me mad when they blast friggin' Fergie, and slam doors, and argue....

ANYAWYS! BYE BYE! LOVE YOU ALL! KISSES KISSES KISSES! (Don't you wish I actually talked like that hahaha)

Later gators,

Morgan

SHAZAM!

So at the request of my momma and Jon haha, I will update this as often as possible. I know it must seem like, ''Come on Morgan, you live at home by yourself and you do nothing all day you should have plenty of time to update your blog.'' My response to that is...I do stuff....sometimes hahaha.

***INTERESTING DISCOVERY!***

I've now gone down one notch on my belt loop haha. But don't worry it's not because I don't eat, because I eat bread and water all the time! Just kidding, I actually do eat all the time, for example this is what I had tonight: Chicken wrapped in prosciutto, topped with mozzarella, and sage and asparagus. My parents are going '' What the hell, since when can she cook?'' WELL I CAN AND IT WAS DELICIOUS!

***END OF INTERESTING DISCOVERY***

So I'll bet you're all wondering what I did today. Well...I'll tell you. I spoke to my momma, dad, and sister on zee telephone and cleaned my flat. Then I went out to the Job Centre, to get hooked up with some employment, I think I may end up working for Royal Mail doing data entry which would be pretty rockin' because all I'd have to do would be like type haha. Then I went and got a new phone because the one I bought at first was cheap and a piece of crap, so now I have a new pink phone that actually works haha. That's what it looks like, to the right of this paragraph. Then I went and bought food, and candles to make my house smell nice.

***INTERESTING DISCOVERY No 2***

My waste trap under my kitchen sink has been leaking for over a week (I think), so my landlord is sending the plumber in tomorrow morning and he is going to do my dishes and clean it all up because it reaks {sp?}. I was wondering what the hell smelt so bad in my kitchen and thought maybe it was just the smell of the water, then I was cleaning today I found it and it was just disgusting so that's why I got candles haha.

*** END OF INTERESTING DISCOVERY No 2***

Tomorrow I will actually go to that park and take pictures, I promise! Anyways, I'm going to go...clean some more haha. I don't know what it is but when you live alone it seems really fun to clean.

P-p-p-peace out!

Morgan!

I love my landlord + his family + my neighbours + English people because they are amazingly nice.

So I have something to tell you that may shock you. You know that British stereotype that they're cold and unkind to new people from other countries....completely false! They are amazingly nice here, like I don't understand. It's as if I'm in like another dimension. First off, my landlord's amazingly nice (and hot, I'm not even lying mom saw him. I for some reason pictured my landlord being some old cat lady, but no it's a hot man score.) He's been helping me out, getting stuff done around my flat for me, give me tips and information about city and area where to go and where not to go.



The next thing that's wicked is that my neighbour above me, this Polish guy, gave me his passcode to use his internet for dirty cheap seeing as how I would've had to have payed like over £200 for internet to be installed in my place. So now I have internet in my flat!



Another amazingly nice thing, my landlord's father came down today just to see how I was doing and if everything was going okay. We got to talking about getting a job and school and such. Turns out him and his wife have a hobby of going to restaraunts every weekend in different parts of the country. Like they'll take the train up, rent a hotel room, and just go to a restaraunt! So he knows every restaraunt in Plymouth and the people that own them so next weekend him, his wife, and Ben (my landlord) are going to take me around to different restaraunts to meet the people and see which one I like best then talk to them about giving me a job! Also when we were standing outside talking, I was asking about the rubbish collection because I hadn't received the bags yet (you have to put your garbage in this brown re-usable bag and your recycling in a black one - stupid) anyways, my neighbour to the right of my flat was outside and overheard our conversation and said I could put my rubbish in her bags if I don't get them by Tuesday, and then invited me over for Sunday Roast Beef Dinner, so I'm going over there in a few hours!



Would this ever happen in Canada? I have no idea. They just really love Canadians here, like it's insane. So I'm off now to go buy some wine or something for dinner, I don't know if they'll drink it but whatever I'm just trying to be nice as per usual!





Morgan



(Oh also, apparently there's this huge park down the street from me which I just thought was the Navy Yard, my landlord's dad said it's a beautiful view so I'm going to go down there also and take some pictures. I'll post them up either later today or tomorrow!)

Hello from rainy England.

So, I just finished typing a whole post and hit "publish post" and the page didn't load so now I have to do it all over again, so sad, so sad. Oh well haha.

Alright so, some of you may know and some of you may not but I am here in England without Jesse. Not to worry though he will be here soon enough, he was held up in Canada because his VISA wasn't finished processing.

So I've been here rockin' it up with my momma. We found a flat, got a laptop, and a mobile all in the span of two days, because we're amazingly cool (well mainly I am but I have to give her some credit she is my mom after all AKA: The Money Train). People are amazingly friendly and it's just a really nice city, right on the ocean. There's a couple really elevated places in the city where you can look out across the ocean and see all the ships and a couple islands. Interesting fact: There are palm trees and bamboo here, the winter weather goes down to only 6C!

The shopping here is really awesome ( I found this out because Air Canada lost one of my bags somewhere, it's probably hanging out in Jamaica or something). Yesterday, I brought (yes I said brought, that's what they say here instead of 'bought') three rockin' tshirts and a nice pair of hightops all for £19.00! Today mom and I went to this little town called Dawlish (just outside Plymouth) it was really cool it had a really neat beach with red rock cliffs and some nice little shops.

Anyways, I'm off now to watch X-factor and eat some food. So I'll make some more posts later!

P-p-p-peace out!

Morgan

Working for the man.

Out sincerest apologies for not updating the blog. We have not had the time lately as we both have acquired  jobs. Joseph is working at Wal-Mart as a stock boy (there's some fancy name for it I don't remember) and I am working at Condillo's as a packer. Our work schedules are completely opposite and we probably won't see each other until next weekend, which is weird considering I sleep in the room right next to him.

We haven't really done anything too exciting lately, except for Sunday night. We decided we'd go for an after dinner (11:30pm) bike ride, however this bike ride turned in to a bike adventure. We rode outside the city on the highway out of town up a huge hill, then cut across a dirt road which was essentially a whole bunch of hills, to the other highway which was an enormous hill that we coasted down at an amazing speed. The most difficult thing was that we had no lights or reflectors so we had to keep pulling off on to the side of the road so we didn't get hit by cars. The adventure that seemed like it took hours really turned out to be exactly an hour, which felt really strange. All in all it was awesome and we're planning on biking to Calgary late at night sometime when we both have time off, next time more prepared with lights and reflectors...maybe even some water.

It has come to our attention....

It has come to both mine and Joseph's attention that many people are reading our blog, and that's fantastic! However due to the lack of commenting on our blog we have become deeply saddened and feel as if we are going through a deep depression. So please, PLEASE, start commenting on our mother-lickin' posts! If you don't know how then here is a step by step guide.


Step 1:

Read the post.

Step 2:

Think of something you want to say.

Step 3:

Click on "Comments" on the bottom of the post.

Step 4:

Type your comment in the box on the right hand side that says "Leave Your Comment"

Step 5:

"Choose an identity" Leave your name by clicking Name/URL

Step 6:

Click "Publish Your Comment"


Yay! Now wasn't that easy?

Love,

Morgan & Jesse xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox :]

Just a Little Song to Tide You Over.

This is possibly the most beautiful song ever created. All vocals and music performed by Morgan and Jesse. Just a note of caution, there is some vulgar language near the end of the song so if you have children near by or something..........take them away.

The Search for Employment...

Well. I am dissapointed to say that our original plans for finding jobs at walmart...Have failed. I'm embarressed frankly. I don't want to completely bash the people that work at walmart, and now I can't, because they've proved themselves better than me, by getting a job that I myself could not obtain. So, the search was resumed today, and Morgan and I found ourselves searching desperately for employment.

We decided to take a trip to safeway to find jobs, and it looks pretty promising, the staff there were a lot more personable, and they seem desperate to fill a few gaps around the store, so I'm sure( I'm hoping and praying) that it shouldn't be too much of a problem. For Morgan at least. I have no sin card... I feel like a failure. A failure in sunglasses. Morgan's sunglasses to be exact.

Done.

Work is completed. I have succeeded in creating the most beautiful incense holder the world has yet to see. Morgan helped too. By help, I mean she distracted me, causing me to cut my hand terribly. Right in time for my stocking job tomorrow. What a bitch. I'm only kidding of course. The blame is shared. I should have been ignoring her. Well, the incense holder is great, and that's all I could have hoped for. By the way. I must apologize for the lack of posts. I guess the lack of comments had broken my heart. It's hard to write for loved ones with a broken heart. Well, my heart is mended, so you can expect posts daily from now on. I can never promise they'll be good. But if you love me you'll read them.

Peace out. A-town.

Soup.

Today was a day of experimental genius. By the way, I (Morgan) am in Airdrie now. I arrived Monday in the afternoon. Anyways, we were starving today and there was absolutely no food in Jesse's house. It was either condiments or old mush vegetables, so we decided to go to good old CO-OP. We bought the best of ingredients we could find and returned home to create our masterpiece. As you can see it was soup...but the most marvelous of all the soups in the world. Included in this soup was, chicken broth, beef strips, bacon, garlic, carrots, onions, tomatoes, basil, oregano, and parsley. It was most excellent!

Anyways, we'll post later. Jesse wants to make an incense holder.


Love forever,

Morgan and Jesse xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Ha.

I just re-read my post. It made absolutely no sense.
Good job on my part. I'll try again later.

Morgan.

Post Numero 3

Well I decided that Jesse's already begun to have too much fun with this and that I should slash him down with my masterful writings. Of course I only kid. I will return shortly, as I'm going to continue with my post (not that you would have known that I left or anything but I thought I'd inform you).

I have returned to my computer with a warm cup of tea in hand, yes warm, not hot. I hate drinking steaming hot beverages. I like it when there just slightly warmer than hot, so that I don't burn myself.
Anyhow, this post is very much pointless. I just didn't want to feel left out from posting since Jesse has already begun.

Lately I've been really begun to realize how quickly both of our lives will be changing. How many 17 year old, freshly graduated, kids do you know moving to a foreign country alone? I certainly don't know any...well apart from us two. The best part about this whole thing is that it's Jesse and I doing it. Because we're just fantastically interesting individuals, searching for some adventure.

Anyways, I believe I'm done for now. I'm beginning to get tired and I really don't remember what I just typed. Oh well.

Morgan

2nd post.

So, I guess this is the first actual post of our new blog. The one that came before this was simply to entice you and make you think "ha, well, this could be at least mildly interesting". Hopefully it worked. I guess if you're reading this, it worked.
If you must know, this blog is to be maintained by both Morgan and I as we document our lives, and our presumed travels and adventures. The situation is as follows.
Morgan is currently living in Winnipeg, finishing up school and preparing to move to Airdrie, where our adventure is set to begin.
I (Jesse Staples) am living in Airdrie (quite obviously) and awaiting Morgan's arrival to Airdrie, where our adventure is set to begin.
The basic plan is to obtain night shift work for maximum pay, then to move off to Plymouth in the UK. Why you ask? I'm not entirely sure, there are many different reasons, which I', sure will be covered in subsequent posts.

This blog will simply be a place in which we can update friends and family of our situation, whilst perhaps posting a few stories and musings along the way. There won't be a concrete structure for the blog, posts will happen as they happen and you'll never know what you might get.
Both Morgan and I will be posting separate stories as they come, as well as combined posts when we get the chance. I'm sure the posts will come flowing in quite quickly for the first while at least, so check back regularly.

Until next time I suppose.
Joseph.

Things I Hate

I hate alot of things. You might say I hate alot of things. You'd be correct, and an idiot in saying so. You'd be correct, because I do hate alot of things. You'd be an idiot, because you'd simply be repeating what I had previously wrote. I suppose that now, you're curious as to what I hate now that I've given you the round-about. I suppose I also suppose I should tell you.

I hate tapeworms. Although I myself have never had the ill fate of aquiring a tapeworm, I (like many others I'm sure) find the thought of having a tapeworm simply revolting. I guess that makes me a bigot. I really know very little of tapeworms and their lifestyles. Perhaps then, I should be more tolerant towards tapeworms, just as I have learned in my life, to be tolerant of the lifestyles that others may choose. If I have learned to accept the lifestyles of other humans, then maybe I can obtain the courage needed to accept tapeworms into my life. A comparison can be drawn between tapeworms and dead unbaptised babies. For those of you who aren't familiar, dead, unbabptised babies end up in purgatory. Or limbo, or even hell depending on your current denomonation. Ragardless, I suppose the babies had little choice in the matter, much like the tapeworms had no free will in deciding to become such disgusting things. I'm sure they had no clue they'd come into this sacred world as such loathsome, revolting creatures.

Well, I've become slightly side-tracked.

Getting back to the point of this peice, I also hate when a large animal, say a bear for instance, decides it has the right to crawl into my room, climb the metal rungs of my ladder, plop down into MY bed, and feel it entirely neccesary to die. Worse yet, is when the animal chooses to die, sometime over the summer while I find myself floating gently down the green waters of the venice canal, soaking in the romantic ambiance of the 18th century decor, bathing in the moonlight whilst sipping a tall flute of the finest of ventian wines. It certainly puts a damper on my return home to find a rotted, puffy, 600 pound grizzly soaking into my sheets.